The Mexican Wall

You know that wall along our southern border that a lot of Americans want to build to keep Mexicans out?

If you're one of those who wants it built to keep Mexicans out because they
a) are brown, or
b) want jobs,

…then please just say so. That way we can have a vigorous debate and maybe get somewhere.

But if you're one of those people arguing that it needs to be built to secure the homeland from terrorists, do us all a favor and be quiet.

Why? Because that argument is a smoke screen and you know it.

How do I know this?

Simple. If you really meant it, you'd be demanding a fence along our border with Canada.

No terrorist has ever been reported to have sneaked into the U.S. via Mexico.

On the other hand, known Islamic fundamentalist terrorists have sneaked into the U.S. via Canada. We know this for a fact because some of them got caught. (In Port Angeles, Washington, on the eve of the new millennium.)

So if you were serious about it being a homeland security issue, you'd be demanding a wall on the northern border instead of the southern.

Is it possible that terrorists might try to sneak across the border from Mexico?

Of course.

Will the wall keep them out?

Possibly. But they won't much care, because they'll just go through Canada. They already have. These people aren't stupid.

Why the Canadian border? Because it's not secure.

Why isn't it secure? Because Canadians
a) aren't brown, and
b) don't want jobs.

There are millions of Canadians in the U.S. We don't mind a bit. They're white, they don't want jobs and they spend a lot of money here. That's why we have a loose border, even though terrorists have taken advantage of it.

All of this by way of saying that playing the "9/11 card" on the issue of the Mexican wall is so much horsepucky.

Shameful and disrespectful horsepucky. 9/11 has been exploited for everything from selling Chevys to winning primaries. Now it's being exploited to keep Mexicans from getting across the border.

Like I said, if you don't want "them" to get any of "ours," just say so. You have plenty of reasonable and logical arguments to support that position without resorting to nonsensical ones that play on the fears of those too dense to see through you.

Come to think of it, maybe that's exactly what you're trying to do. Could work, too: It's the kind of thinking that got the country behind the war in Iraq.

But there's one other little wrinkle that could bring down your wall of cards:

Every single one of the 9/11 terrorists was in this country legally.

A 12,000-mile long, 20-foot high wall around the entire United States wouldn't have made a bit of difference.

On the other hand, that same wall would have kept out a lot of Mexicans.

So what do you say we just call it what it is, okay?

Keeping "them" out.